Happy Mothers Day : You are a Sunflower

"We Are The Sunflowers"

I was struck by the beauty carried in the different bodies around me in the field.
Then brought to my knees on the asphalt at the realization,
that in all of the chaos. . . They Were Sunflowers.
Created from a small seed, growing and changing.
Eventually blooming, bringing joy, and creating seeds of their own.
Stepping back into the shadows to cultivate those new seedlings. . .
While still holding tightly to their own identities.
We are the Sunflowers. . .
We are Mothers. . . and we are not a purpose apart from beauty.
Your beauty is a unique part of who you are. 
​-Jessica Smith

I got a bunch of beautiful mothers together and we celebrated our bodies. We popped champagne. We posed. We smiled. We laughed and then they all followed me home to pose in a streetlight.

Below are letters written by each woman to her body accompanied by images of her during her time with me during our group shoot. I hope you take time to read through each letter and maybe even thank your own body for giving you what it has. No matter what that might be. 

Renee 

Dear body, 
We have been through a lot. I know we've always had this love/hate relationship.
One day I think you're perfect and others I just can't stop thinking of every imperfection.
It took a very long time to truly appreciate you. I know my first pregnancy was hard on you.
My 9lb baby left lots of stretchmarks on my belly. I had a hard time accepting them.
That was 6 yrs ago now and I'm finally ok with them.
2 months ago now you helped me push out my 10 1/2lb baby.
I never could have imagined being able to give birth to such a huge baby. Somehow you managed to not only produce big babies but also allow me to push them out.
After many years of tears and hateful comments, I am finally able to feel confident in my own skin.
I now realize just how amazing my body is and the life it has created.
This photo shoot helped me feel even more confident and beautiful.
Especially after spending 9 months carrying a child and forgetting what it is like to look at myself as a human being and not just a vessel.
Sincerely Renee

Deanna

Dear body,
  Wow we have been through a lot.
​We haven't always gotten along and have definitely had ups and downs.
Sometimes I loved you and sometimes I hated you.
But through it all you were able to give me two beautiful children.
You stretched to fit them. And through all of our issues you were able to keep them safe and healthy. You were able to heal after both c sections and keep up with both the kids.
The late nights, the park trips, being a mountain for them, being a mom for them.
So thank you body for everything we've been through and will go through,
you are stronger than I ever thought.
                       Love, Deanna.

Courtny

Dear body,

Man have we been on a journey! To be honest I haven’t always quite liked you, and sometimes I still don’t. But the reality is I’m stuck with you. And I’m okay with that now. 

We have been through a lot. I didn’t really notice you until I was about 12. I loved you. To me your were perfect. Then, when I turned 15 something snapped inside and I instantly hated you. You were normal size, but I just hated you. I was ashamed of you and kept you hidden. I didn’t like showing you off.  You did always have a good summer tan though. I liked that. One thing I did however always love, was the power you had in cheer. Now that was amazing! But then you failed me. 

7 times... 7 times you failed me and I hated you even more. By 21 I was told you may never give me the one thing in life I so desperately wanted. A baby. You were broken to me and that hurt. I was angry with you. And then one day I asked God to help me forgive you. That day I made peace with you. A month and a half later you helped create my first blessing. You defied all odds her entire pregnancy. You kept her safe until she was ready to enter the world. I then stopped hating you as much and began loving you. 

Fast forward two years, you were broken again. I became angry that you stopped working again. You gained so much weight and wouldn’t let go of it. But you also wouldn’t give me another baby. Until one day you did. You taught me that day that I needed to trust you. But I didn’t listen. However, you didn’t care. You kept her safe for even longer than her sister and defied all odds again! 
​
Then the day came for you to tell me you were giving me another blessing. A son. You rocked his pregnancy! You felt amazing almost the whole time. You recovered from his birth so quickly I often questioned if it was still you. But deep down I knew. I knew the truth. You were you and you weren’t going anywhere. I trusted you. I allowed you to feed him. And then I trusted you to decide when you were ready to stop even though my heart wasn’t ready. I knew you were. We bonded. 

After we bonded I decided to start appreciating you more. In the last two years, I have had days where I cursed you for being fat. For being too squishy. And then one day I decided to stop hating you. I decided to embrace you. Thank you really. I started to see you how my husband sees you. Embrace you how my kids see you and start putting into practice the words I was speaking to my kids about their bodies. I started loving you! 

Body, you are amazing. You don’t always feel the best, but you are mine. You have defied science. You have housed three beautiful children. You have been a vessel to carry me through life. I have had 30 yrs with you and I can finally say “I love you and see you for who God created you to be.” You aren’t a size 2 or heck even a size 10. You are however perfect just the way you are. So thank you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for being broken at times and forcing me to look at the bigger things in life. Thank you for teaching me to appreciate the small things. You are a rockstar! 

Kaela

Dear body,
Thank you so much for everything you have done! Though you didnt alter after pregnancy you gave me such a beautiful gift, my daughter. My breast allowed my to successfully breastfeed my daughter for 17 months and accommodate to wet nurse a little boy who needed you! I will forever praise love to you thank you for always being strong for me

Lindsey

Dear Body, 
I feel like it's been forever since we were really connected. When we beat with two hearts instead of one. I knew who you were before kids. I knew what I wanted you to be - thinner here, rounder there. And while you were growing and birthing my children, I could look at you with nothing but awe. How you could grow a tiny human from nothing, nurturing it, protecting it.
I loved seeing you grow and swell with life. Your hair, thick and lustrous, even if some of that was in places I wish you had left bare. Your belly and breasts getting bigger each week to accommodate the little life being created. 
And then you birthed them. The two best things I've ever done in my life. Each time we breathed, and waited, and pushed, and grunted those babies into being.
I have never been more proud of you. And even after, when I look at your sagging skin and stretch marks, all I see is the amazing things you've done. But I take you for granted. I see a number on the scale as more important than your many accomplishments. I see the distance around my waistline, instead of the distance you have traveled to get me to this point in my life. You deserve better. WE deserve better.
​So what if you will never look like you did before children - I will love you anyway. 

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